I fear obedience and compliance - Teniola Esan

There was a movie that I watched a long time ago. I cant even remember the name of the movie, and it wasn't a popular cast. But there was a line in one scene that resonated so strongly with me that I doubt I will ever forget it in my life. It was a conversation between a french woman and her lover, a writer.


They were both young and in love. And one night, while in each others arms, she told him that she dreamed of settling down in a little cottage in Paris or Notredame and growing old together. But he was distant. His mind was far away. Till she asked what was on his mind and he turned and said to her, "I am a writer, but the world doesn't know who I am yet."


I can never forget those words. "The world doesnt know who I am yet."
There is something about purpose that supersedes every other human endeavour: every great man has his defining work. In the words of Emerson: "The great Man does the great thing...wherever he sits is the head of the table."
For me personally, my greatest fear is living an ordinary life. I fear obedience and compliance. I fear mass mentality: going with a crowd. I fear the path of least resistance: the common path. "The unexamined life is not worth living," so said Socrates. And I agree with him to the letter.


I often think about Christ as a young man at 30, and the clarity of purpose that he had for the work that He came to do on earth. He knew what He came into the world to do; and when He had done it, He could say, "it is finished." He was 33 years old when He made that statement.


This sense of purpose far exceeds every other human pursuit. And i think about it everyday when I observe the acts, behaviours, choices and decisions that people make on a daily basis. I wonder what drives them: what is their decision criteria? what is their chief goal or aim? at what point in time can they say, "it is finished" if they ever can?


Do rich men say "it is finished" after making a billion dollars? Do famous people say "it is finished" after appearing on news headlines, or trending on social media? Do politicians say, "it is finished" after 8 years in a political appointment, when most are wishing for a 3rd tenure? They never do. So where is that void of completion and why is it never filled?


Its not about money. Its not about fame; those are false goals that they dangle in your face to keep you on a wheel to nowhere. A child is born, goes to school, goes to work, marries, builds a house, grows old and gives birth to a child to continue the endless cycle, as he fades into oblivion. Even on his death bed he is gasping for another breath, wishing to go on. He never says "it is finished."


So as a young person; as you struggle to find your place in the world- do you have that clarity of purpose or are you just running on a treadmill?
When can you say, "it is finished?"


The World does not know who I am yet.



(I just drank green tea. No Ribena for now)